"God has saved us and has called us to a holy life, not because of any merit of ours but according to his own design- the grace held out to us in Christ Jesus before the world began now made manifest through the appearance of our savior."

2 Tim. 1:9

I had a great plan. In order to win the attention, affirmation and love of my dad (which I did not know if I had it) and so many other people I had to do something that they would really notice and really be proud of. I was in fifth grade at the time. I knew that at the end of the year there was always a big awards assembly for academics and other accomplishments. I figured if I studied really hard I could become the top student in my class. Yes, I would win the top student award and that day would come in which I could finally bask in the attention, affirmation and love that I so craved. My parents and thousands of other people (OK- a huge exaggeration) would be there to see me walk up to the stage and claim my prize. I would have finally earned all this care and attention to be showered down on me.

So, I worked very diligently all my fifth grade year. My goal was to earn top student which would have proven that I was worthy of all the good that would be coming my way. Well, I did earn the top student of the class that year and when the end of the year rolled around they decided to cancel the awards assembly. Bummer! Here, I was going to finally garner all the attention and notice that I worked so hard to get and no awards were given.

How many of us are desperately trying to earn a love that we already possess? The fact that you are alive means you were fashioned by God in his infinite love for you and given life by his decree. For all eternity, you cannot be loved, affirmed and payed more attention to than you are right now! And the one who is giving you perfect love, affirmation and attention is God. He calls you to receive and live more and more by that love each day. It is God’s design that we would know his love and become perfect sharers in it. This grace is held out to us in Jesus Christ. We do not have to win the top student of the class in fifth grade in order to earn his love. His infinite love is there before we have any successes in life. The fact that you are means you are loved! No award or accomplishment can make the perfect God love you more.

Let us pray: Lord, help me to understand that you created me in your perfect love for me. Help me to know in my heart that you offer me perfect love, affirmation and attention each moment of my existence. I have tried to earn love from so many other people by being successful and I still am in want of greater love. I believe that you are the love I seek. Only in you will I be satisfied. I know that I could never earn you infinite love so teach me how to receive it with open hands. I trust that you will fill me with you, the desire of my heart. Amen.

God’s will!
+Fr. John